Dr Prabhu Dev
3 min readJun 6, 2023

There are many things in life we can’t control.

Letting go of control is the best way to regain total control. Wisdom is knowing what we can change and what we cannot. Doing this leads to peace, serenity, happiness, and freedom.

On what do you spend most of your time worrying about? We worry about the future and the uncertainty that life brings — the things that we have little to no control over — worst-case scenarios! In our fear-based society, we often try to do everything in our power to take control. We like to be “on it” and one step ahead, trying to troubleshoot everything. This is a losing battle that we cannot control just fuels feelings of helplessness and despair.

It is impossible to predict the future. We love to hear correct predictions, even though most get it wrong. Thinking about the Future- prospection — Helps us make more prudent decisions, Motivates us to achieve our goals. Be more open to the fluidity of life.

You don’t need to justify past decisions to move forward in your life. The Past — we tend to cling to it. We are all prone to stick with things that no longer serve us. We hold onto things — It is hard for us to let go. Be reflective or nostalgic and do not get consumed or obsessed with the past.

So many things bother us –people mostly, have the power to upset our basic sense of well-being. You cannot control people. You cannot control their actions, thoughts, feelings, beliefs, etc. you also don’t control the passage of time. I must also tell that there is a lot about yourself that you cannot control. You cannot control the physical needs of your body, emotions and susceptibilities and emotions.

Accept them.

For everything you can’t control, there is usually something you can control instead. But as a general rule, you are in control of your actions and reactions. The reality of life is that things are always changing. We can only ever live in the present moment. Feeling the need to be in control is natural. It’s something we all inherently want. We feel safe. The less we know, the more scared we feel. The need to control is directly rooted in fear — the fear of what might happen outside our control.

Discern What You Can and Can’t Control! When you let go of the need to control what cannot be controlled, life gets a whole lot more manageable. Life is to be lived, not controlled. People will always have an opinion of you good or bad, no matter what you do. You cannot please everyone, it’s impossible.

All of us have been hurt by someone or something in our lives. It’s part of growing up. These wounds often hurt years after they were inflicted and many carry heavy grudges as a result. So let go your grudge. Forgive and don’t forget. Don’t forget so that you may not allow it to repeat!

Our Looks, Height and Skin Colour- We can make only cosmetic changes. The more we accept ourselves the way we are, the happier we will be. Pain is unavoidable, but the suffering associated with it is optional. Health, materialism, loved ones, wealth — we can be certain of is that it will not last.

80/20 your day — the Pareto principle

20% of the things you do give you 80% of the progress you see. So define these and focus on them more, while eliminating the rest. Your life today is essentially the sum of your habits. How in shape or out of shape you are? A result of your habits. How happy or unhappy you are? A result of your habits. How successful or unsuccessful you are? A result of your habits.

Dr Prabhu Dev

Former director of Sri Jayadeva Institute of Cardiology, Former VC of Bangalore University and former chairman of the Karnataka State Health Commission